Category: She Said To No One In Particular

When you drop an entire packet of Splenda — paper and all —  into your coffee, your coffee is no longer splendid.

When one’s day begins by gagging and retching merely as a result of brushing one’s teeth, one wonders what the day shall bring forth.

It just seems wrong to use “forever stamps” when sending condolence cards.

I showed my husband Richard the groovy, psychedelic shorts I bought from Target last week. He said, “They’re so cute! They’re very Peter Max.”

“OMG,” I squealed, “I love it when you act like my gay best friend!”

He said, “As long as my man parts still work, I don’t care.”